I don't really understand it. I keep trying to get ahold of myself. I think that I've got control over this stuff. I think I finally am coming out of the cave for good. man. And then... And then I just feel like doing all the stuff I've always done. And that's why I called that hooker. I just knew I had to do a line of blow off her ass. Not trying to be funny, man. I had to have that fucking flesh in my hands. I had to grab her and pull her and stick my cock deep inside her and I just had to ram it into her until I shot. I felt like fucking worms were crawling around in my skin. Just like energy and nervous energy and power and violence and I had to have more. Wasn't enough. Couldn't be enough.
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